Monthly Archives: March 2016

What its like to have Chronic illness and medical debt.

I’m writing this as I miss my umpteenth day at my school internship due to sickness. I have always been a sickly girl. My immune system seems to be nonexistant during the winter months, and my allergies pressure my chest throughout the rest of the year that my inhaler must always be constant. These type of illness I can deal with. Its a chronic illness that I’ve been dealing with that cripples me, and I currently have no choice but to deal with the pain and continue to loose work days and school days.

I have endometriosis which is when my lady inside parts have extra cells and then they’re really painful and grow in places where they shouldn’t. I also am polycystic. I’ve had it all my life, but its come in spats. Birth control had helped in the past, and in fact I went 3 years without getting a period due a weird birth control I was on. After getting off that birth control I still didn’t have a period for a year because my body was still recovering from whatever funkiness it had been through.

childs pose

child’s pose aka screaming uterus pose

Lots of women have endometriosis. I’m grateful to know a close friend who also deals with this and am able to commiserate with her. As which most women’s health issues, endo affects women in different ways. How I’m affected is that I can feel it coming for the week before I get my period- its minor cramping in my back and my legs, nothing worth crying home about. But then, the day before, the first day, and the second day, and hell. The only way I can describe it is that it feels like a knife is being dragged across my lower back and up and down my thighs. It’s way uncomfortable to walk or even sit up normally. The best position I have found is laying basically in “childs position” with my hands under my head and rock back and forth. Sometimes it helps if my finance rubs my back, sometimes it makes it worse. Sometimes I throw up, sometimes I don’t. No medicine helps EXCEPT for this one magic medicine I was prescribe about two years ago. It was called Mefan Acid and it was literally the only thing that I could take and be a normal human being. However it was $212 WITH INSURANCE for 12 pills. I couldn’t afford it then, and I certainly can’t afford it now.

So what is a girl to do. My medical pills are crushing. I don’t even like to talk about it because of all the times I didn’t have insurance and had to go to the doctors, or the times when I thought my insurance was going to cover the appointment, but it didn’t, and now I owe $200 for seeing a PA for 15 minutes. It’s honestly all too much to think about it, it makes me just want to cry.

pms tea

at least it tastes good…

I can say this: THANK YOU OBAMA. Seriously. Thank you ACA. Because without you, I wouldn’t even have the insurance I have now through college. I was able to go to a general doctor in November for the first time in probably 12 years for just a check up. It was a like a holiday. And I just spend time trying to call different OB/GYN offices that are covered by my insurance through college, however I’ve been told by three that I already owe money and can’t make an appointment until I pay the balance off.  So I guess I won’t be getting any help for my endo anytime soon. Plus I loose this insurance at the end of the school year which is in about two months.

I can only imagine how awful it must be to have chronic illness when you have no insurance. When you’re diagnosed with stomach cancer, but can’t even pay your bill for the check up that got you to the oncologist in the first place. I don’t know what that is like, I pray to God to never know what that is like. To anyone and everyone in that position, I can only hope that it’ll somehow get easier and you won’t have to die because you’re poor.

I wish there was an easier way. I wish I could just call these huge for-profit medical CEOs and be like, “hey, can you help a sister out? ” but I know I just have to keep saving up my money and paying off the bills $10 a piece a month that I do already. Hopefully I’ll be able to get to the gynecologist before menopause.


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